Tonight is the night before our 13th wedding anniversary. 15 years together as the ‘home team’. Just days ago was Jeff’s birthday, another first I’ve experienced since he’s been gone. I am no longer a wife and partner. No longer am I a cancer caregiver. As I reflect on our marriage and the cancer experience…
cancer tips
Advocacy Series: #4 – Get Organized
Create a system that works for you where medical information is easily and quickly accessible. To every appointment or test, I carry a shoulder bag that includes: 1) a list of active medications, 2) a list of the latest scan and test dates, 3) summaries of the test results, and 4) if relevant, MRI or […]
Advocacy Series: #3 – Respect Your Power
You know your body. You know your loved one’s body. You know their medical history, how they respond to treatments, how they feel about a procedure, and what it means when they say ‘quality of life’. You and your loved one want a doctor and medical team who is open to exploring ideas and opinions […]
Advocacy Series: #2 – Do Your Research
#2. Do Your Research. Bring your own ideas and the ideas of your loved one to the medical team – and find the right team member willing to explore them with you. Ask for the clinical studies and research reports and have your oncologist explain them to you. Meet with the radiation oncologist, the medical […]
Advocacy Series: An Active Health Advocate
6 years ago, I was in a meeting when I received a call. “Hi Jen, this is (x) from riding school, there’s been an accident…”
The Third Wheel
We didn’t invite it – it just showed up. It’s inserted itself into every aspect of our life. It’s dominating our thoughts, feelings, family life, hobbies, emotions, and beliefs. We really didn’t want it and now that it’s here, we want to get rid of it.
An ER Visit and the Treatment Toolbox
5:00am: I woke up to tiny groans. Jeff had his fourth round of chemotherapy Wednesday – Friday, so we decided to stay at SCCA House on Thursday. We thought it best to avoid the late night, hour+ drive home and “gift” ourselves time in the morning to relax and rest before Friday infusion. Jeff was having […]
10 Things Not to Say to a Family Battling Cancer
Between the shock of receiving a cancer diagnosis and the sh*tshow of treatment, you begin to share the news with loved ones. Since Jeff and I have been through this rodeo twice (head and neck cancer, 2006 and prostate cancer, 2014) we’ve learned that most people want to know as much about the details as you’re comfortable […]
5 Ways to Bring Relief to a Family Battling Cancer
When someone we care about is battling cancer, we want to support them and their family. We want to do or say something that will make a difference, maybe make things easier. What does support look like, sound like and will it really help?
You’re a Fun-Sucker
The other day, I walked by a small group of kids, standing outside of a shop. A little girl, about 8 years old, said to her friend: